about 4 or 5 months ago, when my ex-roommate's evil dog bit me on the very top of my upper right thigh/ass. it was hard enough to break the skin and there is still a mark, but it could have been worse because this german shepard was the meanest dog ever.
It took me a day to remember the last animal attack, and it was really the only one that was an attack (as I am usually a DrDoolittle of sorts and animals that I am ill-met with tend to be found in situations where we are both confused.. like if klutzyMcFarland falls on the animal, for example).... About 10 years ago I was at a friends house, and her visiting aunt's two Australian cattle dogs flew around a corner and started mauling my legs. Thankfully I was wearing jeans. Not so thankfully, I had bought the jeans with my own money because I was in college.
1979. I was the first born child. My dad had me in a baby chair on the floor. My parents had a blond cocker spaniel named Kapu at the time. My dad was relieving my mom of new parent duties while she grocery shopped. He left my side for a spilt second to answer a the phone. When he returned Kupu had taken a chunk out of my pasty newborn face. Doctor said I was lucky he didn't get an eye.
The last time i was attacked by a animal was 4 years ago in atlanta, my friend tims pit bull tried to rip my hand off when i walked in the door. I casually punched him in the face and said "no sir" and it lunged at me again and i just grabbed its collar and spun it around. Pitbulls are terrible animals not as bad as cats but still terrible, feline holocaust!
I work at a pet clinic, so I get attacked on a weekly basis.
Best story to date from the clinic: Getting my hand mauled THROUGH a muzzle by a german shepherd named "Cuddles".
Best story to date ever: Had my glasses mauled by a monkey when I was 9. He scratched my cheek through the cage while snatching the glasses off my face. It belonged to my mom's best friend, and that little fucker was mean as shit.
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11 comments:
my parent's dog buddy likes to jump on me alot.... other than that, animals leave me alone!
Last saturday my friend's dog bit me. Though in the dog's defense, I bit him first.
Does a fish giving you dirty looks count? If not, never :(
about 4 or 5 months ago, when my ex-roommate's evil dog bit me on the very top of my upper right thigh/ass. it was hard enough to break the skin and there is still a mark, but it could have been worse because this german shepard was the meanest dog ever.
While in Mexico last week, I was attacked by scores of mosquitos.
My cat attacks me on a daily basis. She leaves scratches and scars. She's a fucking monster.
It took me a day to remember the last animal attack, and it was really the only one that was an attack (as I am usually a DrDoolittle of sorts and animals that I am ill-met with tend to be found in situations where we are both confused.. like if klutzyMcFarland falls on the animal, for example).... About 10 years ago I was at a friends house, and her visiting aunt's two Australian cattle dogs flew around a corner and started mauling my legs. Thankfully I was wearing jeans. Not so thankfully, I had bought the jeans with my own money because I was in college.
I guess it was about 4 years ago. A parakeet attacked my nosering, pulling out the stone with its beak and swallowing it. I wear a hoop now.
1979. I was the first born child. My dad had me in a baby chair on the floor. My parents had a blond cocker spaniel named Kapu at the time. My dad was relieving my mom of new parent duties while she grocery shopped. He left my side for a spilt second to answer a the phone. When he returned Kupu had taken a chunk out of my pasty newborn face. Doctor said I was lucky he didn't get an eye.
The last time i was attacked by a animal was 4 years ago in atlanta, my friend tims pit bull tried to rip my hand off when i walked in the door. I casually punched him in the face and said "no sir" and it lunged at me again and i just grabbed its collar and spun it around. Pitbulls are terrible animals not as bad as cats but still terrible, feline holocaust!
I work at a pet clinic, so I get attacked on a weekly basis.
Best story to date from the clinic: Getting my hand mauled THROUGH a muzzle by a german shepherd named "Cuddles".
Best story to date ever: Had my glasses mauled by a monkey when I was 9. He scratched my cheek through the cage while snatching the glasses off my face. It belonged to my mom's best friend, and that little fucker was mean as shit.
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